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January 23, 2006

How to Overcome Sadness and Grief

Dealing with sadness and grief can feel overwhelming, but there are answers. Here are 10 tips you may find helpful and healing.

Dealing with sadness and grief can feel overwhelming, but there are answers. Here are 10 tips you may find helpful and healing.

Lori Prokop Healing Sadness and Grief Tip #1

Our experience on earth includes the inevitable passing of loved ones and friends, as well as the ups and downs of career, business, family and life.

Whether you have lost a loved one, a business or a job, I recommend the highly-respected book and movie, “Life After Life.” They have sold 13 million copies.

Lori Prokop Healing Sadness and Grief Tip #2

Do not feel ashamed of your sadness and grief by trying to contain or hide it. Tears are meant to cleanse and relieve. Cry out your pain. Pray out your grief. Peace will come.

Lori Prokop Healing Sadness and Grief Tip #3

For your own healing, continue on with a life of activities as before. Or you may consider finally doing what you have wanted to do for years.

If you have lost a loved one, know he or she would want you to carry on. Whether here or there, he or she really wants what is best for you.

Lori Prokop Healing Sadness and Grief Tip #4

Refrain from saying you have “lost” your loved one. A line of poetry says, “Love cannot lose itself.” You have not lost. Rather, your loved one is living in a new dimension, yet still close to you.

Lori Prokop Healing Sadness and Grief Tip #5

You can ask loved ones who have passed to continue being with you through your prayers, dreams or signs only the two of you would know. Even friends of mine who have not believed this was possible, once a loved one transitions, tell me it is very real.

Lori Prokop Healing Sadness and Grief Tip #6

Many who have loved ones who transition want to know, “Where is my loved one?”

Spirituality has been telling us and research is now beginning to prove he or she is well, strong and happy surrounded by love. Realize your loved one is fine — quite fine. (See Life After Life.)

Lori Prokop Healing Sadness and Grief Tip #7

Realize your Higher Power has made it possible for you and your loved one to meet here on earth.

Think about that. There are over SIX BILLION people on earth. Out of six billion people you could have been with, you and your loved were brought together here.

Find comfort knowing your Higher Power will also make sure you and your loved one will be together “over there.”

Lori Prokop Healing Sadness and Grief Tip #8

Often the best way to overcome our own sadness and grief is to help someone else feel better. What we give out into the world comes back ten-fold. That includes the love and help we extend to another.

Make a list of all the people you know who are feeling sadness or grief. Next to each name write something nice you can do to brighten his or her day. As you follow through with the list of actions, you will find healing, peace, gratitude and comfort in doing so.

Lori Prokop Healing Sadness and Grief Tip #9

Humans have incredible resilience. Having faith and connection to a Higher Power of 100% pure light and love can help relief, healing and recovery comes quicker and easier.

Lori Prokop Healing Sadness and Grief Tip #10

For some people, the greatest sadness and grief relief is found in their spirituality. Some people who have little prior spiritual beliefs seek answer during hardships or loss. Read spiritual books. Listen to spiritual CDs. Watch spiritual DVDs.

I don’t know if this helps you, but I find comfort in the quote, “It is better to have loved and lost than to have not loved at all.”

Posted by Lori Prokop at 8:38 PM | Comments (0)

January 19, 2006

Success: Key to Success is Self Confidence and Overcoming Inferiority Complex

Let me tell you a brief story. By the time you finish reading this quick article, you will see the key to success.

An inferiority complex, feeling not good enough, leads to less than desirable results, even failure.

I asked a doctor the characteristics of an inferiority complex. She said, “Symptoms can be attacking others, speaking negatively, propagating gossip and doing damage to self. A large number of people, who look like they have self confidence, suffer from the inferiority complex.”

The key to success is to overcome the inferiority complex, either your own or someone else’s.

After speaking to a convention of men and women in a large city, I moved from stage to an area of the auditorium near a sign saying, “Lori Prokop Book Signing.”

At the autograph table I was greeted by a large number of people and signed books when a visibly intense man asked, “Excuse me. Lori Prokop, may I speak with you privately about self confidence and dealing with an inferiority complex?”

I answered, “Yes. Can you wait until the crowd has gone?”

With relief, he politely answered, “Yes, Lori Prokop, I would like that very much.”

Once back stage, he began, “I need all the self confidence I can find. I have to achieve the biggest business deal of my life. Lori Prokop, if I have success, it means the world to me. If I fail, I’m done for.”

I proposed he relax. Few situations or deals are so final, although they may feel to be the only key to success. An important step is to know if he did succeed that was fine. If he didn’t succeed, there would be other days and deals. This is the beginning of overcoming an inferiority complex and achieving self confidence.

He continued, “I have a real inferiority complex. I just don’t have the self confidence I want. Here I am forty-five years old. I’ve been plagued by my inferiority complex. Lori Prokop, I listened to your speech tonight about self confidence. I want to know the key to success you, Lori Prokop, would recommend to help me achieve self confidence.”

“There are three steps to take,” I answered.

“First step is to discover why you have these feelings. I have a free report at my web site that reveals the 12 Rules of Abuse, which are beliefs people learned as children that keep them from achieving what they want as adults.

“You must approach the inferiority complex and self confidence problems looking for a cause and removing it. This may require self-analysis or assistance of a counselor or therapist.

“To help you and be of assistance now with your immediate problem, I will give you my own Lori Prokop formula which works for me. Starting today, I want you to repeat this powerful phrase I will give you. Tomorrow, I want you to say it throughout the day. Do you agree?”

He replied, “Yes, Lori Prokop, I agree.”  

I said, “Here is the Lori Prokop Formula.”

“I am free of worry about how to figure things out. God does that for me. Together, as partners, God and I achieve success in everything, whether overcoming obstacles or going straight to the top.”

I continued, “You can substitute words for what God is to you. The main message here is that you are not alone. Your Life Partner is powerful and on your side always.”

Posted by Lori Prokop at 11:13 PM | Comments (0)

January 18, 2006

End Your Fear of Failure

It is dangerous to have your own fears working against you, especially the fear of failure or success. Either can cause you to freeze and create the situation you fear, even causing failure to thrive.

Everyone is going to fall short or experience failure. The important question is not “did you experience failure?” Rather the important question is “how did you react to the failure?”

Coming up short of a desired outcome can be a great teacher. Much of what people have learned, which has been the key to success, has come from overcoming adversity. Mistakes help us discover how not to do a thing. Success is also a great teacher, showing us how to do a thing.

It is important to see success and failure equal in terms of the lessons both bring.

I was being interviewed as an expert for a book on success. The author asked, “Lori Prokop, how do great leaders handle success?”

I replied, “Great leaders are not as devastated by failure or as elated by successes. They take both in stride knowing they will continue to experience both as they move forward. They are more excited by the insights and knowledge they master as a result of both success and failure.”

Great accomplishments can launch from failure. But if you stop because of failure, you will experience that failure forever.

When you experience failure, and you will, step back and in a non-judgmental manner take a good look at it.

I recommend the words of a great mentor of mine, Ted Nicholas, when he advised me, “Lori Prokop, say these incredibly powerful words, ‘I forgive myself and others for mistakes of the past.’”

I also suggest to you what another great teacher said, “Lori Prokop, you cannot look rationally at the equation or steps which lead to any outcome until you have healed the negative or hurtful emotions attached.”

As you are healing regarding the outcome, ask yourself why this path failed. When you have forgiven yourself and others for mistakes of the past (even if the past is just moments ago), you can look at the situation wiser, more competent and with the sense that failure is only temporary and success is inevitable.

Posted by Lori Prokop at 10:35 PM | Comments (0)

January 17, 2006

How to Get Rid of Addiction and Abuse

Tell me, does this describe someone you know?

Some people who feel inferior use an addiction to try to overcome weaknesses, especially in times of increased stress or deep inner conflict. A person’s inner inferiority complex reveals itself in his or her actions such as addiction, drug abuse, alcohol abuse, child abuse, compulsive eating, blame and aggression among others.

No successful person desires a destructive addiction. What people who choose addiction or abuse really want is the power and ability to create better lives.

Fearing they do not have this power to improve their lives, you will hear these people use excuses and blame to justify their addiction and abuse and protect what little dignity they feel they have left.

If you find yourself or others dealing with addiction or abuse, instead of justifying or blaming, ask the following questions:

• Do I really want healing and resolution for this addiction or abuse?

• Am I willing to improve myself to achieve healing?

• Do I realize I can’t control others? The only one I can control is me.

• Am I willing to take the first step for myself and get rid of my addiction, abuse excuses, blame and other destructive habits to achieve peace and happiness?

Alcohol abuse and drug abuse are common crutches today. I have met many people who feel tongue-tied or awkward at social events. They find a few cocktails or beers “give them a lift” turning them from introvert to extrovert.  There are many people who drink to feel better about themselves, even to the point of abuse or addiction.

For an article entitled Lori Prokop Interviews the Experts, one doctor said to me, “It’s sad but true. A seemingly innocent use of alcohol can quickly and easily become an addiction, especially if people perceive they are someway ‘improved’ when they drink.”

Alcohol abuse, drug abuse and any other addiction are serious forms of personal loss. The people, who depend on any exterior addiction or abuse rather than improving their perceived weaknesses and healing their pains, are beaten from the start.

Such a person can find healing. They must get rid of the addiction and abuse, find a healing system which works and resolve their fears and pains.

Posted by Lori Prokop at 7:24 PM | Comments (0)